Show Notes:
Today is part two of two where we are talking to Pamela Topjian about her memoir I Didn’t Come This Far, to Only Come THIS Far. Over the next 2 weeks you will hear about her incredible journey of overcoming neglect, abuse, and trauma, how therapy helped her through all of these things so she could build the life she really wanted.
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Pamela’s Website – @hypnoBreakthrough on Instagram – @HypnoBrkthrough on Twitter – Pamela’s Facebook page
I’m a survivor of childhood trauma, which continued to adulthood, had a total breakdown in life which was a catalyst to living a life I never would have thought possible & I wrote my memoir to inspire others.
I’m a former licensed nurse that changed careers to certified hypnotherapist. I’m starting a course for integrative Healing arts practitioner mid April. I paint, I love to hike and am happily married and mother of two adult children.
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Transcript:
Speaker A: Welcome to Freya’s Fairy Tales, where we believe fairy tales are both stories we enjoy as children and something that we can achieve ourselves.
Speaker A: Each week we will talk to authors about their favorite fairy tales when they were kids and their adventure to holding their very own fairy tale in their hands.
Speaker A: At the end of each episode, we will finish off with the fairy tale or short story read as close to the original author’s version as possible.
Speaker A: I am your host, Freya Victoria.
Speaker A: I’m an audiobook narrator that loves reading fairy tales, novels and bringing stories to life through narration.
Speaker A: I’m also fascinated by talking to authors and learning about their why and how for creating their stories.
Speaker A: We have included all of the links for today’s author and our show in the show notes.
Speaker A: Today is part two of two where we are talking to Pamela Topgian about her memoir I Didn’t Come This Far to Only Come This Far.
Speaker A: Today we will finish hearing about her incredible journey of overcoming neglect, abuse and trauma.
Speaker A: How therapy helped her through all of these things so she could build the life she really wanted.
Speaker A: I didn’t come this Far to only come this Far a true story of my own journey through a life of betrayal, abuse and neglect to one of peace, love and freedom.
Speaker A: A true story in her own words.
Speaker A: Five years in the making, Pamela Walks Down Memory Lane, an account of her life as a woman born in America in the 60s.
Speaker A: Pamela talks openly and candidly about a life full of neglect, betrayal, abuse, grief and loss.
Speaker A: One traumatic event after another until a total breakdown after being left unconscious on the floor after an attack by her addict husband is a catalyst to an awakening and finally realizing true love, peace and freedom in her 50s triggers poverty, neglect, rape, sexual assault and physical abuse.
Speaker A: A Note from the Author I was going to stop writing when my life settled down, but it’s clear that isn’t happening anytime soon.
Speaker A: I didn’t come this far, to only come this far.
Speaker A: I keep going, keep reaching my goals and dreams.
Speaker A: My hope is to show you that no matter what you go through, that you can do more than survive and just exist.
Speaker A: There’s nothing special or different about me.
Speaker A: Much of what I went through is all too common.
Speaker A: I wrote this for my own therapy, to not have gone to the grave without telling my story, to bring hope and inspiration to others.
Speaker A: Thank you, dear reader, for your interest and support.
Speaker A: Pamela Topgian.
Speaker C: Now So what is the biggest decision?
Speaker C: I mean, moving across the country, in my opinion, is probably going to have been your biggest made for you decision.
Speaker C: But is there anything you changed jobs, you moved across the country.
Speaker C: What other big things have you decided to do for you?
Speaker B: Well, I am married for the third time, and when I had come to California, I didn’t even believe in love.
Speaker B: I didn’t think it was real.
Speaker B: I didn’t think it was a true thing.
Speaker B: And I was dating just, like, just to have fun.
Speaker B: I just wanted to go out and forget about my life.
Speaker B: And not when I was, like, down and out in the worst in the worst times.
Speaker B: But I did start dating and just movies, hikes, whatever, just to have fun and get away.
Speaker B: I never thought I’d get married again.
Speaker B: I never thought I’d be in a serious relationship again.
Speaker B: But I was very, very even though I wasn’t looking for something real or long term, I was very picky.
Speaker B: Like anybody that drank at all or anybody that was too clingy.
Speaker B: No, I just was very picky about it.
Speaker B: But I’m married now, and so, I mean, that’s all worked out for me.
Speaker B: It’s a completely different relationship, completely respectful, completely equal true love, which I never knew before.
Speaker B: Now I know.
Speaker B: So that was huge.
Speaker B: I think writing the book is huge.
Speaker B: There’s been a huge turning point for me to get not only finished the story, finishing it was really difficult.
Speaker B: But getting to a point that you’re like, okay, now it’s done.
Speaker B: One more chapter, because life goes on right?
Speaker C: At some point you have to say, this is done right?
Speaker B: And somebody had told me, like, the year before that, once you’re 60, that seems like a good time.
Speaker B: So just keep writing until you’re 60 and then start editing and stuff.
Speaker B: But when I got married and we got an apartment together and everything, I thought, everything’s going to settle down now.
Speaker B: And I was doing Hypnotherapy and like, okay, everything’s going to calm down.
Speaker B: Now is a good time.
Speaker B: But things just kept happening and just kept going on and all for the good.
Speaker B: Now it’s like, I gotta add this, and I got to add this.
Speaker B: It’s not going to calm down, right?
Speaker B: So just keep going.
Speaker B: And then maybe they’ll be a part too.
Speaker B: I don’t know.
Speaker B: So getting married was huge.
Speaker B: I started painting part of therapy as well, because this is when I was still in the process of I still had a nursing job, but I was in school for Hypnotherapy for the second time.
Speaker B: And I was sort of like, what can I do that’s going to get me out of this nurse mindset, out of this really serious or just always just sleep, eat, work, sleep, eat, work.
Speaker B: And I’ve always loved art, and I’ve always admired any kind of art, and I’ve never painted anything or did any kind of art other than painting a wall.
Speaker B: And so I just got a kid set, and I’m like, I’m just going to try just for the fun of it, just for me, just for creative expression.
Speaker B: And it’s only been I started at the end of 2019, I think, and now some of my paintings, people buy them and people like them.
Speaker B: So I don’t like any of them, but other people do.
Speaker C: I think that’s how I felt about my voice at the beginning.
Speaker C: It’s like I’ll get like five narration jobs and that’ll be it.
Speaker C: I don’t know the exact number I’ve done at this point, but I’m way past five.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker B: You have a great voice for it.
Speaker B: Absolutely.
Speaker C: You don’t think when you’re in the same with art or writing or anything that you do, you think I’m going to do this for me because I’ll have fun doing it no matter if anyone hires me or not.
Speaker C: So like one of my podcasts that I do, I host under a different name that was like, I’m strictly going to do this for fun because no one can tell me.
Speaker C: Well, I mean, I guess the podcast places that host your podcast can say we’re going to take you down, but.
Speaker B: For your friends and family, your people around you.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker C: Well, people can’t tell you what to do or not to do on it.
Speaker C: You can kind of do whatever you want to and people will listen or people won’t listen.
Speaker C: And that particular podcast I’m having, it’s a daily one, and I have 20 to 40 people a day listening to.
Speaker C: That nice.
Speaker C: I’m like, all right, so that’s a thing.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker C: Then I decided to start this one, which is a totally different podcast than that one is.
Speaker C: But yeah, it’s weird with anything that you do.
Speaker C: I feel like do it for you, do it because you’re having fun.
Speaker C: And if you can make money off of it, that’s just a bonus, right?
Speaker B: Exactly.
Speaker B: And that was the same with the book.
Speaker B: I did it for me.
Speaker B: I did not think about publishing until I was closer to the end.
Speaker B: I did it for me, and it was really helpful.
Speaker B: And I would suggest people write out their story, write it out, get it out of you.
Speaker B: And that’s very therapeutic in itself.
Speaker B: And then if it’s something that you feel like you might be interested in the world hearing or it might be inspiring to others, then look into the publishing.
Speaker C: Well, even if you don’t think it’ll be inspiring to others, right?
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker B: You don’t even know.
Speaker B: And I didn’t know either, really.
Speaker B: But I know that I had read others that kind of really struck me.
Speaker B: And those stories were a little more extreme than mine.
Speaker B: And it kind of made me feel like I can relate with a lot of that, even though their stories are more extreme with the tragedy.
Speaker B: But I kind of felt, too, that it would be inspiring for people to know that even though they’re not like horrific things, that they still get stuck there and you can still make it out.
Speaker B: It doesn’t have to be like this horrific thing.
Speaker B: Like I already said this really horrific thing and then on to really great things.
Speaker B: It doesn’t have to be that to be inspiring just to know that somebody’s been through what you’ve been through, and they made it out.
Speaker B: You know, they went on to really live well, I got to a point that I totally trusted myself.
Speaker B: I got to a point that I knew that I would have a better view than I did before.
Speaker B: I knew I trusted myself now.
Speaker B: And like I said, I wasn’t really planning to get married.
Speaker B: I wasn’t looking for a long term relationship.
Speaker B: It was just kind of developed on its own slowly.
Speaker B: We make each other better individually, and that’s what matters.
Speaker B: I think it’s not, oh, I’m better with this person or we’re so together.
Speaker B: It’s like we are.
Speaker B: And especially when you’re a little older, too.
Speaker B: It’s like we have helped each other grow personally just by being in the presence of somebody that respects you and truly loves you and an equal partnership and equal relationship and feeling like you can be fully yourself and not feel like you’re going to be criticized or put down in any way or there’s no egg shells.
Speaker C: Right.
Speaker C: So, yeah, me and my husband, we’re both slightly I say we’re crazy.
Speaker C: We just come up with the most random things.
Speaker C: And it’s like, man, we’ve been married for ten years.
Speaker C: Last weekend was our ten year anniversary.
Speaker C: And so it’s kind of like what we put up with each other for ten years, ma’am.
Speaker C: So what is some kind of advice you have for either someone who is scared to put their story into words or someone that’s scared to then publish the book?
Speaker C: What’s some advice that you may have for?
Speaker B: Well, I just scared to put your story into words.
Speaker B: Write it for yourself.
Speaker B: Just write it as if nobody’s ever going to look at it but yourself.
Speaker B: A lot of people have said to me, I would never remember my whole life, and I didn’t either.
Speaker B: And so you write some of it.
Speaker B: You just start and as you go, you will remember.
Speaker B: And if you don’t leave space, go on to the next memory, and then you can come back to it.
Speaker UNK: Right.
Speaker B: You don’t have to write, especially the first draft.
Speaker B: I mean, the one thing that I was surprised at is how many times you go over and over and over.
Speaker B: That was a big surprise for me.
Speaker B: But yeah, my advice would be write it as if you’re writing it just like a diary or a Journal.
Speaker B: Don’t even worry about the grammar or the spelling or how it sounds if it’s readable or don’t even think that anybody else is going to read those words.
Speaker B: Even if your end goal is publishing from the beginning, make that first draft.
Speaker B: Just get it down and then know that you will go back and make it more readable and more.
Speaker B: You know, then you’ll have an editor.
Speaker B: If you don’t have an editor, that’s another thing.
Speaker B: Get an editor.
Speaker B: Because that was another thing for me.
Speaker B: I self published with KDP, and I had friends read it, and I put it through a couple of programs.
Speaker B: And then when I got the physical book, I noticed errors in it, and I was kind of embarrassed and kind of not mad, but just kind of like, oh, gosh, I did all these steps.
Speaker B: I thought it was going to be fine and it wasn’t.
Speaker B: So I ended up hiring an editor anyway.
Speaker B: So I feel like that’s very important.
Speaker B: If nothing else, hire an editor.
Speaker B: I don’t think that if you have so many people read it, whether it’s friends or people you don’t know, there’s beta readers are out there and stuff still editor.
Speaker C: I’m writing my own book, fiction book.
Speaker C: I haven’t got to the point of editing.
Speaker C: I’m like, not even I don’t know.
Speaker C: I think today I hit, like 22,000 words on it.
Speaker C: So it’s not chump change at this point, but I’m not anywhere close to the editor part of things.
Speaker C: And I’m thinking, like, I’m very meticulous about stuff, but I’m like, I don’t know if I trust me.
Speaker C: In fact, it had been a while yesterday since I had looked at it, probably like a month since I’d written on it.
Speaker C: I had to go back and read through what I had done so far because I’m like, I don’t remember what I did.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker C: So I’m reading through and realizing that some of the chapters my dog is barking.
Speaker C: Some of the chapters, for some reason I had written in past tense for, like, most of it that I’m taking all this time editing.
Speaker C: I’m like, no, get your first draft done.
Speaker C: You can edit it later, right?
Speaker B: And I think that’s so important, no matter what you’re writing, just get that whatever it’s in you, whether it’s a story, whether it’s your memoir, no matter what it is, get it out there.
Speaker B: Don’t look back until you think you’re at a stopping point, until you think I say you think you’re done because you’re not done when you think, right.
Speaker B: That’s another thing of advice that you think you’re done, you’re not done.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker B: So there’s so much there’s so much in the ending of it that was a big surprise to me.
Speaker B: But I think that’s a huge thing.
Speaker B: Don’t start editing before you’re done or before you think you’re done because you can always go back and you’re going to end up interrupting your creative story process if you go back and keep going back.
Speaker B: Three steps back and one step forward.
Speaker B: Three steps back.
Speaker C: I had to go back because I couldn’t remember some of what I had.
Speaker C: I’m like, did this already happen or I’m very much not planned, like, in my head, I know where I eventually want to get to, right.
Speaker B: But I don’t have what you had down yet.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker C: I wasn’t sure.
Speaker C: Like, did I do this already or did I not do this already?
Speaker C: And then you kind of have to read it.
Speaker C: You can’t just, like, find it in the text and read some little snippet.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker C: So what kind of advice do you have for someone if they are going through a situation like yours?
Speaker C: What advice do you have for someone because you said you had the cops help get you out?
Speaker C: How does that kind of phone call to them go?
Speaker C: Was there a special line to call into?
Speaker B: Well, I believe I just called 911 because I had been beat up and I was on the floor of my closet and I didn’t know where he was in the house.
Speaker B: And I didn’t feel safe to come out of that room because I had tried several times earlier in that night.
Speaker B: So I ended up calling 911.
Speaker B: But the advice would be there was a point weeks ahead of that.
Speaker B: I already decided to divorce because I had found out he was self sabotaging, taking his prescription medication not as prescribed.
Speaker B: He was overdosing and taking them together and drinking on top of all of it.
Speaker B: And I was putting so much of my he wasn’t working.
Speaker B: I was working 16 hours shifts.
Speaker B: Twelve hour shifts.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker B: So I was just really for my own detriment trying to help him.
Speaker B: And he was just self sabotaging.
Speaker UNK: Right.
Speaker B: And I said, that’s it.
Speaker B: I can’t do this anymore.
Speaker B: And we had had a year of in and out of psychiatric hospitals, out of other treatment centers and everything.
Speaker B: So I had done all I could and I said, I have to leave.
Speaker B: I am getting a divorce.
Speaker B: But I was staying because he didn’t have a job.
Speaker B: I didn’t want him to go out on the street.
Speaker B: So my advice with that is when you know you need to get out, get out.
Speaker C: Yeah.
Speaker B: Especially if it’s a dangerous situation or it’s a potentially dangerous situation.
Speaker B: Don’t feel like, well, I can’t put them out on the street or worry about whether they’ll be able to pay their bills or whatever it is you need to take care of you first.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker C: That’s kind of their problem.
Speaker C: Yeah.
Speaker B: And that sounds harsh, but if you’re at that point, it’s already been harsh on yourself, too.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker B: And self care always has to come first.
Speaker B: That’s the biggest takeaway.
Speaker B: I think self care has to come first.
Speaker B: And whenever you leave these people, when I left, he still was going to be in the position that he was.
Speaker C: Right.
Speaker B: These people that are like this are not going to.
Speaker B: Oh, I’m going to get better now so that she can leave me, right?
Speaker C: Yeah.
Speaker B: If that’s what you’re waiting for, it’s.
Speaker C: Never going to happen.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker UNK: Okay.
Speaker B: So when you’re ready, that’s when you take the initiative.
Speaker B: Don’t wait.
Speaker B: So you’re knocked unconscious on the closet and so don’t wait till it gets to that point.
Speaker C: If you had gotten out, when you start weeks ahead of time rather than call 911, what would you have done at that point?
Speaker C: Looking hindsight is always best.
Speaker C: What steps would you have taken differently if you’d gotten out sooner?
Speaker B: Well, when I left, I had already been looking for apartments and places, so Luckily I had that.
Speaker B: But I didn’t have anything lined up yet because I didn’t have a date exactly going on.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker B: So I would say if it’s a dangerous situation or even potentially dangerous, have that all lined up.
Speaker B: And I would say not to let them know, which again, sounds a little harsh, but I think you have to think of your own safety not to let them know until you’re ready.
Speaker B: And there’s so many things like we didn’t own a house, we were renting.
Speaker B: So when I filed for divorce, which was before that night, I went to my landlord and told them I was going to be moving.
Speaker B: I knew I was the only one working.
Speaker B: I said, I want off the lease.
Speaker B: Do what you want with him.
Speaker B: So I think to think of maybe make a list of all the things you need to do for you to be okay, to live on your own.
Speaker B: And also, I didn’t think about this before, but it would be good to say I’ve just been through this terrible thing, even if your whole life was great up until then.
Speaker B: Maybe I should get some counseling just to see if I’m okay or if there’s any healing that needs to be done before I get to a point of a total breakdown or anything.
Speaker UNK: Right.
Speaker B: Even if you’re coming off of an abusive relationship, I’m divorcing.
Speaker B: And I just want to see if there’s any healing that needs to be done before I move on with my life.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker B: So I would say do that.
Speaker B: Get yourself some therapy, some counseling set up, make sure you have a place to go.
Speaker B: Because I went and slept at a friend’s house for a couple of nights until I could get something sooner that I had already looked at.
Speaker B: So Luckily, I did have that started in the process.
Speaker B: And yeah, just think of yourself.
Speaker B: And usually those of us that are in those relationships, we’re so used to thinking of them, what’s best for them.
Speaker B: What can I do to help them?
Speaker B: It’s a total switch.
Speaker B: And it doesn’t come easy, but it’s a total switch to think.
Speaker B: What do I need?
Speaker B: What’s in my best interest?
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker C: So what advice do you have for picking the person that you decide whether it be a therapist or a psychologist or whatever the case may be?
Speaker C: What advice would you have if you are in a situation where you think you need counseling or whatever for someone looking to possibly talk to someone, how would you tell them what type of person they need to see starting out and how to pick?
Speaker C: Because I know everybody is different, obviously different therapists.
Speaker C: So what kind of questions and stuff would you as a new person going to therapy, ask?
Speaker B: Well, I don’t know what kind of questions to ask.
Speaker B: But I would say, first of all, if you’re not feeling comfortable with the person within the first few sessions, find another one.
Speaker B: Because if you’re not comfortable within the first few sessions, if you don’t feel comfortable telling this person everything or feel fully open, you’re probably not going to.
Speaker C: Right.
Speaker B: It’s their job to make you feel comfortable.
Speaker B: It’s their job to do that in the beginning.
Speaker B: Also, don’t expect magic.
Speaker B: Don’t expect them to tell you what to do and have all the answers either.
Speaker UNK: Right.
Speaker B: And know it’s going to take time, but it takes patience and it takes diligence to find the right kind of therapy or treatment for you.
Speaker B: So know that you might go through a couple of different therapists or a couple of different types of therapy, and also that some of these things work well together.
Speaker B: If you want to do something very more alternative and maybe get some Reiki treatments, it’s like energy healing and then also see a psychologist or psychiatrist, that’s totally fine to put those two together if you like both, but one isn’t really enough.
Speaker B: So, yeah, I think making that connection early on, if you don’t, it’s okay.
Speaker B: You don’t have to feel guilty.
Speaker B: They’re used to it.
Speaker B: They’ll feel like, oh, I have to break up with my counselor that I’ve been to three times at the end.
Speaker C: Of the day, too.
Speaker C: Just some people just don’t mesh.
Speaker C: Right.
Speaker C: You have some people that you don’t want to be your friends because you just don’t mesh with them.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker B: And your therapist is not your friend either.
Speaker B: So look at them as they’re doing a service for you.
Speaker B: You’re hiring them to do a service for you.
Speaker B: So if it doesn’t work out.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker B: Whatever the reason, and I do hypnotherapy if the exact same method that I do or the exact same techniques that I do that I learned someone else may do the exact same thing, but I might have a connection with somebody that the other one doesn’t or vice versa.
Speaker B: And as a therapist of any type or any type of treatment or counselor, you want to have that connection to where you’re really going to feel like you can dig deep and help this person and not have them guarded and not have them feel uncomfortable with you.
Speaker B: If you’re seeking to look for another counselor, another type of therapy and the person you’re seeing gets mad at you or tries to make you feel guilty in any way, that’s just your sign that you need to leave that person.
Speaker C: That’s kind of a red flag at that point.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker B: Because they should want you to be better, whatever that takes.
Speaker B: Right.
Speaker A: All right.
Speaker C: Well, I think we covered it.
Speaker C: It’s a little bit different because usually I go into like, how did you come up with the story?
Speaker C: Which for you that’s not a question.
Speaker C: So how did you come up with your life?
Speaker C: Is a really stupid question to ask.
Speaker B: Yeah.
Speaker C: So at this time, I’m guessing trying to get new patients and stuff with the hypnotherapy.
Speaker C: Do you have any plans right now for another book or have you started on part two?
Speaker B: I haven’t started on part two, but I had so many people say, oh, I’ve always thought about writing a memoir.
Speaker B: I always wanted to write my book and ask me questions about writing it and getting to the point of publishing it.
Speaker B: So I did start a book about I don’t have a title yet, but just about the whole process.
Speaker B: So I’m writing a book about the process of writing my memoir.
Speaker C: Okay.
Speaker B: So I started that and I did also start another one.
Speaker B: I’m trying my hand at just a story like a more fiction one.
Speaker C: So going back to when you were a kid.
Speaker B: Yeah, kind of.
Speaker B: So I mean, it’s just like a story line in my head.
Speaker B: So we’ll see.
Speaker B: I don’t know.
Speaker B: But again, both of those I’m writing not I just started writing just in a document, and I’m like, I’m not writing it as if anybody’s going to look at it tomorrow.
Speaker B: I said it took you five years.
Speaker C: To write this one.
Speaker B: So I’m kind of giving myself the year I’m giving myself a year timeline to decide where I want to go with those and how much I’ve worked on those.
Speaker B: I’m not making any kind of a goal.
Speaker B: I’m not working on them every day.
Speaker B: It’s just kind of like in the background.
Speaker C: Okay.
Speaker B: So I’m doing this and we’ll see where it goes.
Speaker B: In a year’s time.
Speaker B: I’ll see where I’m at with it.
Speaker B: All right.
Speaker C: Well, that sounds like a good plan.
Speaker C: Well, thank you so much for talking to me today.
Speaker B: Thank you so much.
Speaker C: Thank you so much for your time.
Speaker C: You have a good rest of your Sunday.
Speaker B: You, too.
Speaker B: Bye.
Speaker A: Pamela’s.
Speaker A: Favorite fairy tales are ones that include triumph over difficult situations.
Speaker A: The story of Cinderella is one of the most popular in the world in the west.
Speaker A: It has enjoyed a continuous following since its revision and publication by Charles Perrault in 1697 ce but the tale of the young heroine, unjustly forced into servitude who becomes elevated to royalty, was told for centuries before in China during the Tang Dynasty 1618 to 907 ce and the Story of Ye Shen in this story, the evil stepmother and stepsister kill the animal friends of Ye Shen, but in the end are destroyed and the girl wins the hand of the King.
Speaker A: The story was reworked in the 17th century Ce in Italy prior to Perrault’s version by the poet Jim Bautista Basil.
Speaker A: 15 ce the post humorous publication of Basil’s now famous children’s book, Il Pinta Moron in included the story The Gata cinepola the Cat Cinderella, which is recognized as the first European appearance of the story in print, although like Brazil’s other tales, it was already known in Italy.
Speaker A: The story was afterwards reworked and published in other forms in Germany, Russia, and other countries.
Speaker A: Scholar Patricia Montagon, writing on the Cinderella tale, notes, Cinderella’s thousand year global circulation makes it the world’s best known fairy tale, but no one can really say where it began or when Cinderella’s magic slippers brought her to Europe.
Speaker A: Today we will be reading Ye Shin by Eileen Louie.
Speaker A: Don’t forget, we are also continuing the original story of Beauty and the Beast on our Patreon.
Speaker A: Ye Shen, a Cinderella story from China retold by A Ling Luis in the dim past, even before the Qin and the Han dynasties, there lived a cave chief of Southern China by the name of Wu.
Speaker A: As was the custom in those days, Chief Wu had taken two wives.
Speaker A: Each wife, in their turn had presented Wu with a baby daughter.
Speaker A: But one of the wives sickened and died, and not too many days after that, Chief Woo took to his bed and died, too.
Speaker A: Ye Shin, the little orphan, grew to girlhood in her stepmother’s home.
Speaker A: She was a bright child, and lovely, too, with skin as smooth as Ivory and dark pools for eyes.
Speaker A: Her stepmother was jealous of all this beauty and goodness, for her own daughter was not pretty at all.
Speaker A: So in her displeasure, she gave poor Ye Shin the heaviest and most unpleasant chores.
Speaker A: The only friend that Ye Shin had to her name was a fish she caught and raised.
Speaker A: It was a beautiful fish with golden eyes, and every day it would come out of the water and rest its head on the bank of the pond, waiting for Ye Shin to feed it.
Speaker A: Stepmother gave Ye Shin little enough food for herself, but the orphan child always found something to share with her fish, which grew to enormous size.
Speaker A: Somehow the stepmother heard of this.
Speaker A: She was terribly angry to discover that Ye Shin had kept a secret from her.
Speaker A: She hurried down to the pond, but she was unable to see the fish, for Yaxin’s pet wisely hid itself.
Speaker A: A stepmother, however, was a crafty woman, and she soon thought of a plan.
Speaker A: She walked home and called out, Yea Shan go and collect some firewood.
Speaker A: But wait, the neighbors might see you leave your filthy coat here.
Speaker A: The minute the girl was out of sight, her stepmother slipped on the coat herself and went down again to the pond.
Speaker A: This time the big fish saw Yashin’s familiar jacket and heaved itself onto the bank, expecting to be fed.
Speaker A: But the stepmother, having hidden a dagger in her sleeve, stabbed the fish, wrapped it in her garments, and took it home to Cook for dinner.
Speaker A: When Yehen came to the pond that evening, she found her pet had disappeared.
Speaker A: Overcome with grief, the girl collapsed on the ground and dropped her tears into the still waters of the pond.
Speaker A: Oh, poor child, a voice said.
Speaker A: Ye Shin sat up to find a very old man looking down at her.
Speaker A: He wore the coarsest of clothes, and his hair flowed down over his shoulders.
Speaker A: Kind uncle, who may you be?
Speaker A: Yaesha asked.
Speaker A: That is not important, my child.
Speaker A: All you must know is that I have been sent to tell you of the wondrous powers of your fish.
Speaker A: My fish?
Speaker A: But, sir.
Speaker A: The girl’s eyes filled with tears, and she could not go on.
Speaker A: The old man sighed and said, yes, my child, your fish is no longer alive, and I must tell you that your stepmother is once more the cause of your sorrow.
Speaker A: Yay Shin gasped in horror, but the old man went on.
Speaker A: Let us not dwell on things that are past, he said, for I have come bringing you a gift.
Speaker A: Now you must listen carefully to this.
Speaker A: The bones of your fish are filled with a powerful spirit.
Speaker A: Whenever you are in serious need, you must kneel before them and let them know your heart’s desire.
Speaker A: But do not waste their gifts.
Speaker A: Jesus and wanted to ask the old Sage many more questions, but he rose to the sky before she could utter another word.
Speaker A: With heavy heart, Ye Shin made her way to the dung heap to gather the remains of her friend.
Speaker A: Time went by, and Ye Shin, who was often left alone, took comfort in speaking to the bones of her fish.
Speaker A: When she was hungry, which happened quite often, Yaxin asked the bones for food.
Speaker A: In this way, Yaeshin managed to live from day to day, but she lived in dread that her stepmother would discover her secret and take even that away from her.
Speaker A: So the time passed, and spring came.
Speaker A: Festival time was approaching.
Speaker A: It was the busiest time of the year.
Speaker A: Such cooking and cleaning and sewing there was to be done.
Speaker A: Yes Shen had hardly a moment’s rest.
Speaker A: At the spring festival, young men and young women from the village hoped to meet and to choose whom they would marry.
Speaker A: How Ya Shen longed to go, but her stepmother had other plans.
Speaker A: She hoped to find a husband for her own daughter and did not want any man to see the beauty as Yashin first.
Speaker A: When finally the holiday arrived, the stepmother and her daughter dressed themselves in their finery and filled their baskets with sweetmeats.
Speaker A: You must remain at home now and watch to see that no one steals fruits from our trees, her stepmother told YeChan, and then departed for the banquet with her own daughter.
Speaker A: As soon as she was alone, Yaeshin went to speak to the bones of her fish.
Speaker A: Oh, dear friend, she said, kneeling before the precious bones, I longed to go to the festival, but I cannot show myself in these rags.
Speaker A: Is there someone I could borrow clothes fit to wear to the feast?
Speaker A: At once she found herself dressed in a gown of Azure blue, with a cloak of Kingfisher feathers draped around her shoulders.
Speaker A: Best of all, on her tiny feet were the most beautiful slippers she had ever seen.
Speaker A: They were woven of golden threads in a pattern like the scales of a fish, and the glistening soles were made of solid gold.
Speaker A: There was magic in the shoes, for they should have been quite heavy.
Speaker A: Yet when Ya Shin walked, her feet felt as light as air.
Speaker A: Be sure you do not lose your golden shoes, said the spirit of the bones.
Speaker A: Yaeshin promised to be careful.
Speaker A: Delighted with her transformation, she bid a fond farewell to the bones of her fish as she slipped off to join the merrymaking.
Speaker A: That day, Yaeshen turned many a head as she appeared at the feast.
Speaker A: All around her, people whispered, look at that beautiful girl.
Speaker A: Who can she be?
Speaker A: But above this stepsister was heard to say, Mother, does she not resemble Are Ya Shen?
Speaker A: Upon hearing this, Yehen jumped up and ran off.
Speaker A: Before her stepsister could look closely at her, she raced down the mountainside, and in doing so she lost one of her golden slippers.
Speaker A: No sooner had the shoe fallen from her foot than all her fine clothes turned back to rags.
Speaker A: Only one thing remained a tiny golden shoe.
Speaker A: Yaitin hurried to the bones of her fish and returned to the Slipper, promising to find its mate.
Speaker A: But now the bones were silent.
Speaker A: Sadly, Ashen realized that she had lost her only friend.
Speaker A: She hid the little shoe in her bed straw and went outside to cry.
Speaker A: Leaning against a fruit tree, she sobbed and sobbed until she fell asleep.
Speaker A: The stepmother left the gathering to check on yachan, but when she returned home, she found the girl sound asleep with her arms wrapped around a fruit tree.
Speaker A: So, thinking no more of her, the stepmother rejoined the party.
Speaker A: Meantime, a villager had found the shoe.
Speaker A: Recognizing its worth, he sold it to a merchant, who presented it in turn to the King of the Island Kingdom of Tohan.
Speaker A: The King was more than happy to accept the Slipper as a gift.
Speaker A: He was entranced by the tiny thing, which was shaped with the most precious of metals yet which made no sound when touched to stone.
Speaker A: The more he marveled at its beauty, the more determined he became to find the woman to whom the shoe belonged.
Speaker A: A search was begun among the ladies of his own Kingdom, but all who tried on the sandal found it impossibly small.
Speaker A: Undaunted, the King ordered the search widened to include the cavewomen from the countryside where the Slipper had been found.
Speaker A: Since he realized it would take many years for every woman to come to his island and test her foot in the Slipper, the King thought of a way to get the right woman to come forward.
Speaker A: He ordered the sandal placed in a Pavilion by the side of the road near where it had been found, and his Herald announced that the shoe was to be returned to its original owner.
Speaker A: Then, from a nearby hiding place, the King and his men settled down to watch and wait for a woman with tiny feet to come and claim her Slipper.
Speaker A: All that day the Pavilion was crowded with cavewomen who had come to test a foot in the shoe.
Speaker A: Ye Shen’s stepmother and stepsister were among them, but not Ye Shen.
Speaker A: They had told her to stay home by day’s end.
Speaker A: Although many women have eagerly tried to put on the Slipper, it still had not been worn wearily, the King continued his vigil into the night.
Speaker A: It wasn’t until the blackest part of night, while the moon hid behind a cloud, that Ye Chen dared to show her face at the Pavilion, and even then she tiptoed timidly across the wide floor.
Speaker A: Sinking down to her knees, the girl in rags examined the tiny shoe.
Speaker A: Only when she was sure that this was the missing mate to her old Golden Slipper did she dare pick it up.
Speaker A: At last she could return both little shoes to the fishbones.
Speaker A: Surely then, her beloved spirit would speak to her again.
Speaker A: Now the King’s first thought on seeing Jehen take the precious Slipper was to throw the girl into prison as a thief.
Speaker A: But when she turned to leave, he caught a glimpse of her face.
Speaker A: At once the King was struck by the sweet harmony of her features, which seemed so out of keeping with the rags she wore.
Speaker A: It was then that he took a closer look and noticed that she walked upon the tiniest feet he had ever seen.
Speaker A: With a wave of his hand, the King signaled that this tattered creature was to be allowed to depart with the Golden Slipper.
Speaker A: Quietly, the King’s men slipped off and followed her home.
Speaker A: All this time, Ya Shin was unaware of the excitement she had caused.
Speaker A: She had made her way home and was about to hide both sandals in her bedding when there was a pounding at the door.
Speaker A: Yaeshen went to see who it was and found a King at her doorstep.
Speaker A: She was very frightened at first, but the King spoke to her in a kind voice and asked her to try the golden slippers on her feet.
Speaker A: The maiden did as she was told, and as she stood in her golden shoes, her rags were transformed once more into the feathered cloak and beautiful Azure gown.
Speaker A: Her loveliness made her seem a heavenly being, and the King suddenly knew in his heart that he had found his true love.
Speaker A: Not long after this, Ye Shin was married to the King.
Speaker A: But fate was not so gentle with her stepmother and stepsister.
Speaker A: Since they had been unkind to his beloved, the King would not permit Ye Chen to bring them to his palace.
Speaker A: They remained in their cave home, where one day it is said, they were crushed to death in a shower of flying stones.
Speaker A: Thank you for joining Freya’s Fairy Tales.
Speaker A: Be sure to come back next week to hear Carly’s journey to holding her own fairy tale in her hands and to hear one of her favorite fairy tales.
